Living with the opposite sex

Post Reply
JJW009
Site Admin
Posts: 6538
Joined: Thu Jul 14, 2005 12:00 am
Location: Midlands
Contact:
Living with the opposite sex

Post by JJW009 »

OK there are some things my Mother never told me about women, and especially those things you only discover when you live with one. I decided to start this thread to share the wisdom. Please contribute your experiences and help prepare us for the worst!



I'll start:







1. Do you have ANY idea how bad week old sanitary towels smell!?



It's bin day today - and I've just had to empty the little bin in the bath room... I had to peel them off the bottom with my fingers. Imagine a week old dead cat kept in a nice warm place... Mmm ripe!







2. Chocolate. We all know girls eat chocolate. Do you know how much?



If I bought 5 pounds of the stuff, I'd have to be sure to eat my share the same day because there's no guarantee there will be any left in the morning!




--------------------


<div class='signature'> <img src='http://myanimelist.net/signature/JJW009.png' border='0' alt='user posted image'> ??? <img src='http://imagegen.last.fm/LastfmMyspace/oartists/5/JJW009.gif' border='0' alt='user posted image'>
paulpowers
Posts: 1316
Joined: Wed Jul 27, 2005 12:00 am
Location: High peak
Contact:
Living with the opposite sex

Post by paulpowers »

yes week old ST's stink also have you had to unblock the plug hole in the bath yet now thats disgusting its all slimy and hairy :angry:

or trying to find your shower gel among the various lady products in the shower i mean WTF does ladys shower gel need sand init for :blink:




--------------------


<div class='signature'> Dreams come at the cost of reality
User avatar
RedeyesUK
Posts: 2598
Joined: Sun Jul 17, 2005 12:00 am
Location: Over there, then left a bit..no, a bit more..that's it!
Living with the opposite sex

Post by RedeyesUK »

Always make sure you use a different brand of razor to your girlfriend - My ex used to have a nasty habit of putting her old razor heads (that she used to shave her legs, as well as other more unmentionable places :unsure: ) back in the dispenser with the new ones!

That's not funny when you get a nice 'new' razor blade, only to find you'd have been better off shaving your face with a potato peeler! :o



Oh, and stand well back when she's spraying perfume, otherwise you'll smell like girls for the rest of the day - not good when you're going to work.....
Bob
Posts: 2
Joined: Mon Jun 19, 2006 12:00 am
Living with the opposite sex

Post by Bob »

They fart in bed. I don't like the competition :angry:



Bob
paulpowers
Posts: 1316
Joined: Wed Jul 27, 2005 12:00 am
Location: High peak
Contact:
Living with the opposite sex

Post by paulpowers »

never let a woman borrow a hoodie as it will smell like perfume for weeks and everyone will think your a puff




--------------------


<div class='signature'> Dreams come at the cost of reality
belchingmatt
Posts: 2893
Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2006 12:00 am
Location: Spartaaa
Living with the opposite sex

Post by belchingmatt »

JJW009 wrote:1. Do you have ANY idea how bad week old sanitary towels smell!?



It's bin day today - and I've just had to empty the little bin in the bath room... I had to peel them off the bottom with my fingers. Imagine a week old dead cat kept in a nice warm place... Mmm ripe!


An ex of mine had a friend who once forgot to remove the last tampon of a period and only realised at the start of the next one. She went to the doctors to have it removed and it supposedly smelt really bad.




--------------------


<div class='signature'> I'm not addicted to porn, I'm addicted to masturbation. Porn is just an enabler.



<img src='http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y81/ma ... Threat.gif' border='0' alt='user posted image'>

There are plenty more fish in the sea, get your tackle out and see what bites.



Divers go deeper and stay down for longer.
JJW009
Site Admin
Posts: 6538
Joined: Thu Jul 14, 2005 12:00 am
Location: Midlands
Contact:
Living with the opposite sex

Post by JJW009 »

shawpower
Posts: 90
Joined: Tue Apr 17, 2007 12:00 am
Location: Ireland
Living with the opposite sex

Post by shawpower »

It must be true then! <!--emo&:lol:--><img src='http://i2.ifrm.com/html/emoticons/laugh.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='laugh.gif' /><!--endemo-->



The one thing I'd suggest is to make a real effort to notice when the female stops taking the pill between cycles. If she isn't on the pill, then you have to try and notice when ST's appear in the shopping. Basically for that week or so, do lots of housework. You can then relax for the other three weeks. If you don't do this, you are leaving yourself open to mood attacks.



Basically she will be in a bad mood due to the time of the month, and even though you mightn't do anything wrong, she will snap at you. If you snap back, prepare to DIE!!! It then becomes an issue about how you are in a bad mood, that you don't take notice of when she is off colour, that you are insensitive, or any other unlimited various huge (in her eyes) issues that she can think up.








--------------------


<div class='signature'> <img src='http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v713/ ... ition6.gif' border='0' alt='user posted image'>

Post Reply